FOOD // Madison Square Eats 2012!

Remember that one time it was delightfully sunny one day, but then sad and rainy the next day, but then delightfully sunny again the next day but strangely cold and windy for being so delightfully sunny? SOUNDS LIKE THE PERFECT TIME FOR AN OUTDOOR FOOD FESTIVAL. 

Madison Square Eats is back! But only until June 1st. It's a great collection of food festivalable things from all over Manhattan and Brooklyn that aren't fried oreos. Check it out in that little triangle plaza next to Eataly on 25th and Broadway. 

PHOTO DUMP TIME. 

Kafta & Eggplant Wrap (Lamb & Beef, Harissa, Eggplant and Lettuce) and Phoenician Fries topped with Sumac, Salt and Garlic from Ilili. -- EAT IT

Pulled Pork Empanada from La Sonrisa -- EAT IT

Ground Beef Empanada from La Sonrisa -- EAT IT

Pulled Pork and Salsa Verde Sandwich with White BBQ sauce from Mayhem and Stout -- EH

Pork Meatballs with African Onion, Tempting Tomato, and Not Your Momma's Brown Sauces from Mighty Balls - EH

The Norma Arancini (Eggplant, Tomato, Basil, and Ricotta) from the Arancini Bros. - EAT IT

Pork Belly and Beijing Duck Buns from Hong Kong Street Cart - EAT IT

Shaved Milk Snow topped with Fresh Mangoes, Frozen Champagne Grapes and Red Bean from Hong Kong Street Cart - EAT IT

I ATE IT.

Oh yeah, and they have ALCOHOL!

How Canada does Chips

Whenever I go to Japan or Taiwan, there's only one thing I look more forward to experiencing again than the incomparable awkwardness of otaku maid cafes: FOREIGN CHIP FLAVORS.

Foreign countries always have flavors of chips that are 8000 times more exciting than American flavors for some reason. Like these CLAM CHOWDER FLAVORED DORITOS.

So during this past shoot in Canada, in between my extreme Tim Horton's binges, I sought me out some foreign Lays (IF YA KNOW WHAT I MEAN).

Here are two in particular that caught my eye. And by "caught my eye," I mean "was closest to me when I remembered I was in a foreign country and that foreign countries have crazy potato chip flavors." 

Ruffles - "All Dressed"

OH CANADA, you're so vague. Turns out bring flavored with all of the dressing in Canada amounts to tasting like french dressing, which I suppose is historically accurate. Rating: NOT BAD, CANADA.


Lay's - "Ketchup"

There's a reason nobody dips potato chips in ketchup. KETCHUP POTATO CHIPS ARE THE MOST HORRENDOUS FLAVOR IN THE WORLD. I've literally never tasted anything as horrible as Lay's Ketchup chips. It's not that I don't like ketchup. Ketchup is delicious. It's a great source of lycopene, which can help fight osteoporosis, diabetes, and reduce your cholesterol. Plus it makes my sweet potato fries super tasty.


But these chips do not taste like ketchup. These chips taste like that watery residue that floats at the top of ketchup after it settles for a while. These chips taste like that... but mixed with the poop of lemons if lemons could poop. 


On top of that, the sourness leaves an aftertaste that is as if all 6000 of my tastebuds just marathoned Human Centipede 1 and 2, then Fever Pitch, then Adam Sandler's Jack and Jill.


Rating: BAD CANADA, BAD. You're lucky your Honey Dipped Tim Bits are so delicious...